Losing Your Sparkle…

I’ve felt kinda down both mentally and physically these past couple days… not much different to report on that end… so figured it was best not to blog while I’ve not in the best of spirits…. Chemo is not easy for sure.

As I watch all of my industry friends begin their new year…. it makes me so happy for them, yet also so sad… because this year would have really set our business apart… and it just saddens me so deeply to feel like my career as a wedding photographer is going to be forever changed…. I must say that while I was so busy I didn’t really have the time or take the time to look at all of the talent in our industry, but there is some really amazing talent in our industry… of wedding photographers…

I’m truly happy for the successes of others, but can’t help but feel that….. I’m a little lost. I’m sitting here… day after day, not feeling the greatest…. and trying so desperately to look forward to what lies ahead…. but really not knowing what that might be, is also worrisome…. And I have so much to overcome before I can even think about it….

The responses of many of my brides have truly warmed my heart. I honestly only have maybe 2-3 brides that have expressed worry or reluctance when it comes to our choices and decisions and for that I’m sooooo honestly grateful…. I cry at most of the responses…. It’s been such a huge relief and I’m so thankful.. Former and future brides… I always really expressed the importance of relationships with them… and many of them I truly consider friends… For that I am so incredibly blessed….

I have so many people in the wedding industry who have gone above and beyond for me… for our family… but I urge everyone to consider this upcoming party/fundraiser as a way for everyone to come together and have a great time….  I realize the focus is on raising funds for our family…. but I really hope that everyone will come together as a way to take some time out of life and just enjoy…. https://itrulycare.com/events/pink-is-the-new-black-fundraiser-for-dawn-gaddy If I’ve not met you… please take the time to introduce yourself to me and my family….

When I say, I’ve lost my sparkle…. I will not stop smiling or forget my purpose is bigger than what I do for a living…. or bigger than what I hoped to be…. I will try to focus on what I have to look forward to…. But, I can’t help for a minute to feel so saddened…. I’ve gained so much….. but I’ve lost a lot too….

I have a busy year ahead… for sure, of editing and creating storybooks and being there for as many of the brides that I can…. I’m just going to cherish it…. and enjoy it so much…. Knowing, it may be the last of my career as a wedding photographer… So many other obstacles to overcome… 4 more chemotherapy sessions and surgery and radiation….

Also I wanted to ask for a few prayers for a lady that is struggling…. her cancer was in remission for 2.5 years and has metastasized and I pray for her all the time…  It’s very scary…. I’m looking at beating the cancer that I have… and to know that it’s always going to be a concern, that it could return… or I could lose my battle…. scares me… which is why I have focused on trying to eat the very best way I can to avoid my cancer from returning… and pray that it’s all taken from my body while I have the chance…. 

Jill Brzezinski-Conley – Breast Friends on Facebook

Also, please keep Katie Moore in your prayers and thoughts and if you can find some financial resources to pass along to their family, it would be most appreciated… She’s a 12 year old girl battling ovarian cancer…. I can’t even imagine being in their family’s shoes…

http://www.gofundme.com/5vc760

Thank you all for your love and support…. You truly have no idea how much it means to me and our family….

We are fed, we are provided for…. we are so blessed. Thank you…

 

 

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s