Yesterday I was so excited about my photos…. I forgot to post about some other things that happened….
Lady Di as we now lovingly call her…. Diane Esposito, my friend that has been helping me with my fundraiser… she’s helped me through so much…. Well she’s just been bombarded with a lot of stuff on her plate…. besides me. So, she had an especially hard week… and it had drained her. So yesterday I used the excuse that my step daughter was in town and wanted to meet her…. which she really did…. BUT, Tillie and Marc Defang of Marc Defang New York really wanted to surprise her with HER VERY OWN personalized shoes… and since her husband Vinny is the Carolina Panther’s local DJ…. hers were themed Carolina Panthers… and oh my goodness… Marc did an amazing job…. Here are a few of the highlights of her new shoes…. Both Tillie & Diane have become such AMAZING friends to me…. I seriously love them both…. I was so glad I was well enough to be a part of this…. I’m so sorry for the set up Diane… I promise you can trust me…. ❤ Thank you Brianna from Briannastar Photography for taking these photos!!!
As we were leaving, Tillie said… “You are just so happy… you’re glowing”…. then they asked me… “you sure you’re not pregnant?” No, No, NO!!! But…. I said… I am…. I am SO happy!!! How can I not be… 1. This has put everything into perspective…. just how important the REAL and true things are… my family, my friends…. it really has. 2. My marriage…. my husband has been truly amazing and makes me feel so loved and adored and he rubs my fuzzy head all the time….. 3. I’m surrounded by all these people who are constantly letting me know how much I’m loved…. in so many different ways…. So on the way home I told Brianna…. How can I NOT be happy? She said… yeah, I mean it really sucks…. but you really are blessed. I am….
So after that, Bri and I met my friend Sharon and her daughter Amber at Crossroads Grill for lunch… it was such a nice time. I am thoroughly enjoying something I haven’t had in a LONG, LONG time….. TIME. Time to take the time….. It feels so amazingly wonderful….. I’m so glad we made the time for lunch…
Then we went to Wal-Mart…. My brother and sister in law gave me a gift card and I went to Wal-Mart and used it on scarves and accessories…. ❤ We had so much fun…. BUT, the one thing I commented to Bri when walking through Wal-Mart…. “Everyone is looking at me”…. I’d commented on my Facebook the other day…. that I had been smiling at people… and the ones in wheelchairs that you wonder… why are they in wheelchairs… I made a special effort to smile at that lady and she smiled back and it was so heartwarming….. BUT, yesterday I felt so vulnerable. I walked in with my bald head…. and at times I forgot that I had it…. but other times people look at you and it was so uncomfortable and odd feeling. Vulnerable is the only word that I can think of….. I’m sure I’ll get used to it… my head will get balder….. and I will have no choice… But, it was different.
Then we rushed home to do my photos and the response… has been the most views on my blog so far…. I’m so humbled by that. The comments of support…. just WOW! My Mom said… don’t put them on your blog…. lol I don’t ALWAYS do what my Mamma says…. 🙂 I love you Mom!!! I hope and pray…. that other women will embrace cancer. Don’t allow it to force pity on yourself… Take your moments of strength and make those moments shining moments…. Those photos…. are exactly what I hope to do for other women when I am well….. I want women to feel empowered, I want to call it the Sunshine Project.... and really make those women feel beautiful. Embrace their chemo rash…. Yes, it’s all over my face and body and it’s NOT attractive….. and allow their skin to show…. Those will probably be the last photos of myself with my own breasts….. This spring, mine will be gone…. and I will be flat chested for months…. before I can even think about reconstruction….. I want women to feel beautiful… and I hope that my bravery will inspire them to be brave. I love you Brianna for doing this for me… and maybe you’ll come up with your own project…..
Yesterday was an amazing and emotional day!!! ❤