If I can ask for anything today.. it’s that you pray for my husband. He’s carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders…. He’s worked 6- 7 days a week for the past 4+ years… maintaining a full time job that offers great flexibility and insurance…. and worked with me doing weddings and engagement shoots… he’s stressed, he’s frustrated, he’s angry…. he’s panicking.

Everything is so uncertain… we’ve stopped all advertising, we’ll be forced to give up our studio, we’re going into survival mode. I have yet to let my brides know of my condition… so that looms. We are both scared…. petrified… that they will not be understanding… they will not be accepting of the fact that we will have to hire a second shooter.. and  photo editor… (we will wait til after Thanksgiving to call them individually). Then what will we do? I will have a good period of time where I may not be capable of being on my feet for 10 hours… surgery, reconstruction… etc…

I’m trying not to worry… but it’s impossible, when I can see that my husband is not sleeping and generally frustrated that the smallest things are bothering him….

All of this sucks… we were peaking… we finally have features in magazines… we have amazing reviews… vendor referrals, bride’s referrals….. more bookings going into 2014 than ever before….. and now it’s all about to spiral out of control, in his words “like an engine that ran out of fuel”…. we depend on this income, hugely…. so I understand what he’s feeling… he’s worried about me.. he’s worried about this business….

So, everyone’s asking me what they can do… please pray for my husband and my family to remain strong and try not to worry….

To begin my journey… and progress towards what is happening, I’m trying to embrace it…. (trying!)… First step before I get my hair all cut off on Tuesday… was to color it back to close to the normal color… I found the attached hair dye (nothing but henna) for $11.99… We are going out tonight so I thought it would feel good to have my roots covered up…. This will probably be one of my last photos with long hair…. 😦

Before you begin the process.. you wash your hair and do not use conditioner… then you put the Henna in…. Leave it on for 1 hour…. and rinse. Nothing else is needed… and my hair came out with NO tangles….and it dried smooth… and is baby soft…  Once I have hair again, I will definitely remember this line of hair products… if the shampoo is anything like this, I will definitely need to add it to my beauty products…

Attached is the hair style I’m planning to hopefully achieve… maybe with a shorter bang…